The Truth About Enigma

I wanted to address some of the conspiracy rumors circulating about Enigma right now. There has been a torrent of misinformation washing through a sewer of speculation and I have taken it upon myself to set the record straight. But first I have to set the scene.

I’m not going to go into the origin of dragons and their endless wars through the epochs, but we should dip our toes into the past couple of centuries. In 1874, a young Nikola Tesla escaped conscription from the Austro-Hungarian army by hiding and living in a system of caves in the mountains near Tomingaj, Croatia. During his hiding he met a zmaj, a dragon, within the cave system. The dragon seemed sluggish and senile to Tesla. The dragon begged for any gold Tesla had on his person. Tesla, being a generous man, gave the dragon a gold coin he had always carried for good luck. His mother had always insisted Tesla should carry the coin for just such an encounter. The dragon looked at the coin longingly and ate it.

Most of you have heard the stories of dragons coveting and hoarding gold. This is not a habit borne of greed but of survival. In the same way humans need iron in our diets, dragons need to ingest gold periodically. Dragons are extremely intelligent. They are also very agile for their size. Both qualities can be attributed to a superior neurophysiology that uses the low oxidation and high electroconductivity of gold to a dragon’s advantage. In short, dragons need gold to survive.

Tesla and Vaskaja, the zmaj, became fast friends. Tesla was enamored with the alacrity Vaskaja could perform integral calculus in his head. Vaskaja borrowed Tesla’s dreams of moving to America. The dragon believed no other dragons had ever travelled to America, and its gold would be ripe for the picking.

In 1884, Tesla moved to America, bringing along Vaskaja. Many people speculate on the logistics of smuggling a dragon across the Atlantic. No one has come up with a satisfactory explanation. Tesla and Vaskaja quickly get to work on revolutionizing the field of electrical engineering and procuring funding in the process. Many historians believe Tesla was supremely bad with money, always running and low and begging for more from countless investors. In truth, Tesla scrambled to get money any way he could to buy gold for Vaskaja’s consumption.

In 1943, Tesla dies. Soon after, the FBI hires John J Trump to analyze Tesla’s lab notes. Trump quickly learns of the existence of Vaskaja and the extent of his partnership with Tesla. After weeks of negotiations between Vaskaja, Trump, and the DOD, Vaskaja is moved to his new home under the Federal Reserve Bank. In exchange for Vaskaja’s intellectual prowess, he is given a stipend of gold once a week from the reserves.

In 1944, after stunning victories by the US Allies in WW2 due to the strategies created by Vaskaja, the US government agrees to procure more gold for the dragon. Vaskaja and the powers that be orchestrated the implementation of the Bretton Woods Agreement between several world powers. Consequently, many nations began depositing gold into the Federal Reserve Bank in New York.

The following years were relatively peaceful and bountiful time for Vaskaja. He had plenty of gold to eat. And he was visited on a regular basis by John J Trump. On a few occasions, John brought his nephew, Donald to visit. These visits during Donald’s early years left an indelible mark on the young man, which may give a clue as to why to this very day Donald strives to surround himself with gold wherever he goes, emulating his childhood hero.

But the bounty did not last. Bretton Woods was failing. More and more countries were threatening to take their gold back. In a desperate move to appease Vaskaja, Nixon abandoned Bretton Woods and killed the gold standard, effectively stopping the hemorrhaging of gold from the reserve.

While in service to the US government, Vaskaja learned of two other dragons living in the states. The first, Ormelstex, was long thought dead by Vaskaja. Ormelstex was badly injured in a war thousands of years ago. He was thought to have fled from the combat and died. Ormelstex did flee, but he survived. How Ormelstex ended up in America, no one is quite sure. The wingless dragon keeps his own council. What is known is during the Civil War, a still gravely injured Ormelstex convinced several wealthy southerners to hide their wealth in the swamps with him. He would encircle and protect their gold deep in the swamps and they would protect him. They named themselves the Knights of the Golden Circle. Ormelstex ate all the gold, healed quickly and left them destitute. He made several deals with the US government after the war. He moved into the Mammoth cave system shortly after where the government fed him a steady diet of gold and provided them with counsel. When the US government began to face a shortage of gold, President Roosevelt outlawed the private ownership of gold. The government quickly and cheaply procured more gold for Ormelstex and build a reserve over a branch of the Mammoth cavern system the dragon frequented. We know this reserve today as Fort Knox.

We don’t know much about the second dragon. It emigrated from Asia sometime shortly after the California gold rush and established residence under the San Francisco mint. It has been speculated that the Great Quake of 1906 was a consequence of the dragon giving birth. No one seems to know if this is true, and if it is, what happened to the young drakes.

In 2007 and 2008 the financial crisis took a huge toll and the dozen or so dragons still living throughout the world. There was a bum rush for gold. The writing was on the wall. Dragons needed to devalue gold by any means necessary. They soon banded together and under the sobriquet of Satoshi Nakamoto created Bitcoin. They quickly began recruiting the top cryptographers in the world to create a new ecosystem that would topple traditional financial institutions and consequently decimate the value of gold.

Guy Zyskind is one of those recruits. Enigma’s true and sole goal is to create cheap gold by playing a key role in the web3 stack and destabilizing the status quo. That is the truth. It’s what you deserve.

Edit: I failed to mention Vitalik Buterin is obviously a part of the dragonhood cabal. His surname comes from a tiny hamlet in Croatia, not thirty minutes from the same cave Tesla met the zmaj so many years ago. It has yet to be ascertained whether Vitalik is simply a recruit of the cabal or is in fact a dragon himself. According to folklore, a zmaj has the ability to take on a human form.


Now that the SEC has failed to prevent the creation of this fabled SCRT gold can you fill us in on what happens next or must we wait even longer to see how the story unfolds?

I’m currently working on a novel, but I may write a sequel to this once my first draft is done. I may edit the original post, too. It needs it.